The Bet
by MatthewOhMyMaplyPancakeGod
Summary: After a long night of drinking Alfred awakes to a few scary things. One, his brother yelling at him. Two, the fact that there was no breakfast ready. And Three, he lost a bet to a certain Russian and would have to live with him for a month. Was it all Alfred's fault that this has happened, or is there more to this then both he and Russia realize?
1. You did what?

Well I wanted to do something funny, and something for the AmericaxRussia fans out there! I hope you like it.

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"What do you mean you lost yourself in a bet?" A usually soft voice cried out in shock. "How could you be so stupid?" a blond sighed. He closed his violet eyes his glasses slid down as he pinched the bridge of his nose. His long light blond hair brushed against his cheeks as he slowly began to shake his head. Matthew Williams had no idea how to scold his brother for this. Who loses themselves in a bet for gods sake?

"He suggested it! I thought it was a fool proof thing!" a loud whiny voice responded. Another blond was sitting in front of him on a black couch. His large strong shoulders were slumped in shame and his posture was far from perfect as he lounged. His bright blue eyes showed very little fear; of course, he was too stubborn to be truly scared. The sunny blond should have known better then this. Sadly, Alfred F. Jones had very little sense when he drank.

"You thought you could out drink Russia? Are you really that stupid?" Matthew growled. For some reason he was really irritated by the fact that he was going to lose his brother to Ivan. "How long do you have to live with him?"

Alfred shrunk deeper into the couch, he hated to admit it, but Matthew terrified him when he got like this. He tried to think back and remember what happened. His thoughts were still fuzzy but he remembered the main points of it. Matthew and Alfred had went out, they found Ivan and his sister at a bar. The Russian was drinking so Alfred had joined him. Soon he was too smashed to think straight, he suggested a bet, Ivan wanted him to live with him for a month if he lost. The next thing he knew he was waking up on Matthew's bathroom floor with said Canadian standing over him, fuming at the news. Apparently, Ivan had told him just in case Alfred did not remember. That had been wise of the Russian.

"First of all, it seemed like a good idea at the time and second I think it is for a month," he sighed, drumming his fingers on his stomach.

Matthew shook his head more, "Alfred, if you did all the things that you thought were a good idea, you would be dead by now. I cannot bail you out of this one though." The Canadian decided that Alfred needed to learn from his mistakes and this would really be a good one to learn from.

"Aww, but dude! Can't you just wave your magic hockey stick and everything can be okay?" Alfred whined.

"Non Alfred, Arthur is the one with the magic objects, not me," he reminded him.

"But bro, you have a talking bear!" Alfred pointed out.

"He is different and very special, don't bring him into this," Matthew warned him.

Alfred crossed his arms over his chest and pouted, his cheeks puffing out slightly. "Fine, have it your way Mattie, and not in the Burger King kinda way."

The Canadian looked at him, puzzled by his words, "You are very confusing Alfred, now get out of my house and have fun with Russia!"

"Nooooooooooooo!" Alfred whined and clung to the fabric of the couch. "You can't make me go!"

"Alfred, don't make me get the hockey stick," Matthew grunted, staring him down.

The American seemed to contemplate that for a few moments, but the moment that Matthew started walking towards the closet that held the stick of doom, he shot off the couch and ran towards the door. "Right bro! See you later; I hope you feel sad when I turn up dead," Alfred yelled over his shoulder.

A sigh escaped Alfred when he heard the door slam shut behind him. Sometimes he wondered if his brother was cruel to him on purpose. That made sense to him in more then one way. He did burn his capital with England, they both probably danced happily around the fire.

Crossing his arms over his chest the American wandered off with a very pouty expression plastered on his face. "I had better get ready, a hero never goes back on his bets," he muttered to the empty air. He paused when a thought hit him, "Or….I could try to get Tony to abduct me again!" he cheered and took off running towards his home.

A certain blond stood in his front window, watching the other run off. A smirk crept over his lips, "Everything is going according to plan," Matthew whispered.

Kuma giggled at his feet and looked up at him, "Who?"

"I'm Canada, and it is time for phase two of the plan," he said softly before pulling his phone out of his pocket. He dialed a number and waited until a feminine voice answered. "The plan is in motion, it is your turn," he stated before hanging up.

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Well that is it for right now, leave a review for me and I will try to update it quickly. The next chapter is all Ivan's!


	2. Follow the clothes

Well I was threatened with a stick so I figured that I had best update this. I hope you all enjoy!

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A busty woman stood outside of a large dark wood door. Small tremors of nerves ran through her body while she continued to stare at the intimidating door. The woman chewed gently on her bottom lip while she tried to decide if she should knock on the door or not. Her hands were sheathed in thick gloves to battle the lingering chill in the air a. Dots of white were stuck to the heavy blue coat that cloaked her body, it took a few moments, but the snow slowly melted into dots of water and slid down the material. Snow flurried behind her in the open air, it stuck everywhere it could and covered the ground with white. After a few moments her cell phone rang in her pocket, she jumped in slight fear before she realized what it was and answered the phone.

"Hello?" she whispered, her breath came out as a puff of fog in front of her. She listened for a moment before nodding, "Understood," she hung up quickly and slipped her phone back into her pocket.

Gathering her bravery, she lifted her hand and knocked on the terrifying door. The dull thuds echoed inside of the house and she waited. Time passed slowly while she waited, the silence was starting to get to her. After a minute had passed her ego and bravery had deflated, she seemed close to cowering on the porch. Taking her chances she touched the iron door handle, her blue eyes closed and she quickly twisted it. There was a pop when the doorknob turned and the door swung open.

A look of slight shock crossed her face; it had been open the whole time? With flushed cheeks the woman slowly entered the dark home. The entry hall was dimly lit by the soft glow of a lamp that sat on top a small cherry wood stand. The floor was the same dark wood that made up the door but it was hidden under a dark red rug that stretched from the door to a large staircase. The stairs were wood as well, what was surprising was the tan coat that laid on a few of the steps.

"Brother?" the woman called, her wet boots made imprints on the rug when she walked in. There was no answer; the air was thick with silence she grew a little tense. She walked to the staircase and picked up the coat that had been discarded on the ground. It smelled strongly of vodka with the weak undertone of sunflowers. Peeking up the stairs, she saw two boots lying on different steps and a pair of gloves at the top of the landing.

Her eyebrow slowly raised, "Russia?" she said a bit louder. She began to climb the stairs, picking up the boots and gloves when she reached them. Her strides paused when she reached the landing and she saw his shirt down the hallway. "Follow the clothes," she muttered to herself. "They will lead you to your drunken brother…" Hurrying down the hall, she scooped up her shirt and the pair of socks that fell from the shirt. Hesitating for a moment she slowly opened the door that the shirt had been abandoned at.

The hinges creaked lowly, making her shudder. The woman unconsciously compared it to the sound of a tomb being pushed open. "Russia?" she squeaked. The bedroom was dark heavy curtains covered the windows to block out all light. The room was very clean with only a few pieces of furniture. A cherry wood dresser sat almost forgotten in a corner. There was a small nightstand with a lamp on it beside a rather large bed.

A black comforter moved slowly on the bed when a large figure began to shift under it. There was a soft growl from the shape causing the woman to tremble in fear. "B-Brother…it is time to wake up," the woman whispered.

"Why are you here?" a voice rumbled under the blanket.

"Well, I thought I would come over and h-help you clean the house or set up a guest bedroom or something," she muttered, placing all of the clothing she had collected on her way into the room. The body paused and a second later, a head popped out from under the blanket.

"Why do you think I would need help cleaning or setting up a bedroom sister?" Ivan asked, his eyebrow rising at her.

Ukraine paused for a few moments, "Um…I was just um…guessing, and well I was just mentioning something's that may need to be done," she stuttered.

The Russian slowly sat up in his bed; his chest and neck were bare to his sister's gaze. He did not really notice when his sisters eyes widened and she stared at the scaring on him. "Who told you that I was having someone over?" he questioned. His violet eyes were blood-shot and he was paler then normal. He had defiantly drunk too much last night.

Tears immediately flooded her eyes, was she that bad of a liar? "Canada called me and was distressed because his brother lost that bet to you," she spoke so quickly that she stumbled over her own words.

Ivan sighed and leaned forward to grab his shirt from the pile. "I see, so the Canadian is that worried about his brother?" he chuckled, dressing quickly.

Ukraine sniffled and nodded a little, "Yes, he is. Brother…promise me that you will not hurt the American," she said softly.

Ivan paused his scarf in his hands, "Define hurt," he looked over at the woman.

Yeka peeked at him before biting her bottom lip in thought. "Um…no torturing, enslaving, tormenting, or messing up his mind," she whispered.

"That is unreasonable," he protested. "Those are the main reasons I accepted that bet," he sighed.

Yeka smiled a little, "I see, but you should still be nice to him. I will help you if you want," she offered.

Ivan slipped his coat over his shoulders the more he thought about last night the more things did not really add up. Why would Alfred suggest a bet in the first place? He must have known that he would never win, was he just that dumb? Ivan smirked to himself; he was sitting here wondering if the American was dumb. He must have a pretty bad hangover. "I do not need help sister, I promise I will behave as long as he does," he sighed not wanting her to be upset with him. Besides, there were other ways to break the happy blond American.

Ukraine smiled a little more at him, "Thank you brother," she said happily.

Ivan nodded at her, but really did not want her to be here for when the American arrived, if he even decided to come. "So sister, about that gas bill…" he started.

The woman's eyes widened and a second later, she was sprinting towards the front door, yelling apologies and saying that her boss said they could not hang out anymore. The door slammed shut and the Russian began to chuckle. It made him feel a little bad to scare her away but it never grew old.

Sighing Ivan started towards a guest bedroom, he might as well get the room ready now.

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Well there you go for now, I hope you liked it. Please review and I will update soon.


	3. GO AWAY! GO AWAY!

NEW CHAPTER! HECK YEAH! Sorry for it being so late, I have been very shiny with college and other stuffs. I hope you all enjoy and that it was worth the wait.

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Alfred slumped in his chair, the jet flew swiftly through the air. This was so stupid! He had been betrayed by his best friend it totally sucked beyond all reason. The blond could not help but think back to what had happened between him and the alien.

"_Dude! You were cool with abducting me last weekend! Why won't you help me out and abduct me again now!?" Alfred whined at his alien friend. _

_ Tony simply stared at him for a few moments, "Fucking," he muttered, unwrapping a cheeseburger._

_ "I'm so not needy!" The American snapped. He snatched the burger out of the alien's hand and took a bite out of it. "You don't deserve this burger! You're betraying America right now, so you don't get it!" _

_ Tony huffed and crossed his arms, "Bitch!" he growled. _

_ "Whatever dude, have fun while I'm gone. Take care of the house and my pets," he huffed, his cheeks puffing out while he pouted. _

_ Tony simply nodded at him, his arms crossing over his chest, "Fucking…" _

_ Alfred slowly turned before spinning back around, "Don't make me beg man! Just kidnap me for a few days or a month and then it will all be cool! Don't make me live with the RUSSIAN!" he cried. His pleas had fallen on deaf ears though. The next thing he knew he was packed and at the hanger with his privet jet. _

"Stupid traitorous aliens," he sighed. His brown leather gloves lightly gripped his glasses and slid them off. Placing Texas in the chair next to him, he settled down in his chair. "Might as well sleep," he muttered his blue eyes slowly drifting shut. "It is always best to rest….before…reaching hell."

Ivan sighed heavily it had taken him awhile to clear the dust off the furniture in the guest bedroom. It had not been used in a very long time, it had plenty of furniture, and if the heavy curtains were moved out of the way then there would be a lot of light. However, the Russian left them in place. He did not want to see snow right now and he had no doubt that it was snowing out there. General Winter was not being too kind to him this year. Ivan was not sure of what he had done to earn the General's wrath, but he had learned not to question him. Life was easier that way.

Without grace, the Russian plopped down on the bed. His head was still pounding not only from his hangover but also from his sister's visit. It had been unwise in the end to make her cry so loudly, worth it but at the same time stupid. Violet eyes traveled to a small clock on the wall. He did not know a time that the American planned to arrive for some reason it made him nervous. Why had to American suggested this bet?

His thoughts circled around to that question repeatedly. Was it some plot to harm him in some way? Maybe he was trying to get close to the Russian so he could stab him in the back. It seemed logical they both fought with each other each time they were in the same room. What the hell was he planning? Ivan thought back to the night before it was a little fuzzy but clear in most aspects.

_Ivan was sitting at the table of a bar his sister had talked him into going to. He was on his fourth shot of vodka, he barely listened to his sisters words as she blabbed about random things. He had noticed that her eyes shot to the door of the bar every few minutes. Was she waiting for someone? He shrugged off the thought who would his sister be expecting anyway? His question was answered only moments later. The door slammed open and a booming voice filled the building. Ivan had to suppress a shudder when the voice claimed that they were a hero. The Russian had stood quickly, intent on leaving before he was spotted but his sister grabbed his arm. "Stay Ivan, it may be fun to get to know the brothers!" Ukraine claimed as she pulled him back into his seat. _

_ Brothers? His eyes followed hers and rested on Alfred. The damn American seemed so happy his blue eyes shined like the skies of the summers he so rarely saw. His golden hair seemed to gleam in the lights of the bar. His skin had been kissed by the sun; it made Ivan a little jealous. A moment later, he noticed that someone was standing beside him. The person clung to a small bear and seemed to be very nervous. He looked almost exactly like America. Who was that boy? He was surprised when the shy looking boy raised his hand and waved at him. Wait…he waved at him? He peeked back at his sister only to find her arms flailing at the other two nations. _

_ "What are you doing sister? We do not want their company!" he hissed at her. The woman froze and he could see tears in her eyes. _

_ "I am so sorry Brother, it is just that Canada and I are good friends," she sniffled at him. _

_ Canada? Oh! That was right he looked back at the other nations who were now walking towards them. That was right, the shy one by America was his brother Canada. It was a little worrying to Ivan that he did not know that immediately. _

_ Alfred's voice suddenly rang out next to him, "Awww, why do we have to hang with the Commie?" _

_ Ivan sighed and took another shot of vodka. It was going to be a long night. _

_Hours later and more then a few bottles of vodka, he was actually getting along with the American. Alfred was talking animatedly about very little things, Ivan had turned in his seat to face him and was simply listening. Ukraine and Canada had been talking in hushed voices to each other. They had been for the better part of the few hours they had been together. However, their eyes turned towards the other two often. It had concerned the Russian at first but he slowly grew to an uncaring state. _

_ "Well! I am gonna be right back, I have stuff and things to do," Alfred laughed before standing and stumbling off. Ivan hummed lightly and relaxed in his chair. Resting his elbow on the table, he leaned his chin into his hand. A moment later, his eyes closed on their own accord. _

_ It seemed that only a second later someone sat in Alfred's seat and touched his shoulder. His eyes opened to look at the other…had his hair grown while he was gone? He did not even notice that his sister was staring at him and the other man had vanished. _

_ "Dude, wanna make a bet?" the other said. Why was he talking softly now? Oh well!_

_ "Da, a bet sounds nice," he giggled slightly. "What shall we bet and do?"_

_ "Okay, I challenge you to a drinking contest! Cause I am totally a hero and could kick your butt," why did he sound so sarcastic? "If I win then you have to live with me for a month, but if you win I will live with you for a month."_

_Ivan paused and had to think about this for a few moments. There was no way he would lose…but being around Alfred for a month? The company was very tempting to him. He was so lonely in his home. "Okay America, you have a bet." _

_ "Sweet dude! I'll go get us some booze!" the next second he disappeared into the crowd. _

_ Ivan smiled a little more and closed his eyes again to relax. The American was certainly a weird one. Minutes later he heard the chair next to him move again. His eyes opened and he smiled more at the American. "What did you get to drink?" his eyes went to a large bottle in front of the both of them. _

_ "That was there man, why would we need something to drink?" Alfred questioned. _

_ "The bet, da? Drinking contest whoever wins gets the other for a month," he giggled. _

_ America stared at him for a few moments, "Oh right! Got it dude, I guess I forgot about it," he laughed before pouring both of them a drink from the bottle._

_ They were unaware of the smug looks the two nations across from them had. _

_ After 30 minutes of drinking, Ivan had won and Alfred had passed out. He had closed his eyes again and the next thing he knew Ukraine was waking him up that morning. _

He blinked a little and sighed, he should have disagreed with the bet. Why was he not thinking straight? It should have been automatic! Nyet America I do not accept your stupid Capitalist dare! It would have been that simple. Now he had to put up with the blond for a month and he promised his sister that he would not hurt him. This would be interesting.

His head lifted slightly when he heard the doorbell ring was he here already? Standing he adjusted his coat and scarf before going to the front door. Fully expecting it to be America he did not even pause before opening the door.

"Marry me brother!" a feminine voice screeched.

Ivan's eyes widened at the sight of his younger sister. He was frozen for only a moment, when she reached towards him he bolted deeper into his home.

"Go away! Go away! GO AWAY!" he cried as he ran.

Alfred snored loudly in his chair, not even realizing that the jet had landed. He slept peacefully in his chair, clinging to the arm rest. A nervous pilot approached him and lightly tapped his shoulder. "Um sir, we have arrived in Russia," he muttered to the sleeping nation. The snow had slowed their progression into the cold nation so they had been an hour later then they had predicted. The poor pilot was not looking forward to telling the man this.

The American stirred his blue eyes opening slightly, "Five more minutes," he groaned as he shifted in his chair.

"But sir…we are over an hour later then expected," he sighed. Alfred sat up slowly, rubbing his eyes slightly.

"We are? That's cool," he yawned. "You can go home after I leave, but ya better come back for me in a month."

The man nodded eager to get out of the cold and back to the sunny states.

Alfred peeked out the window and frowned at the snow. Damn, why was it snowing now? Standing he stretched slightly his joints popping. "Gahhh!" he grunted in slight pain. He really had to stop doing that but it felt so good after he did. His body relaxed when he straightened the pilot had already hurried off. Alfred pulled out his phone and dialed his brother's number.

It rang a few times before his brothers soft voice answered, "Hey dude! I just got to Russia and I must say it is already hell. You should feel really guilty about not helping me man. I'm gonna end up dying here somehow, I just know it! Who was that chick that was gonna pick me up again?" He paused, actually allowing his brother to answer him. He listened for a few moments, "Right, the one with the boobs got it!" he hung up quickly.

Alfred gathered the bags that he had dragged onto the jet and hopped off the jet. He fell into a snow drift that reached his knees. His body began to tremble the second the cold air touched him. "So cold!" he cried, running towards the airport.

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Poor poor Ivan... Oh well! And I hope you all noticed the little swap out I pulled at the bar~ -winks- I hope you enjoyed! Please please please review for meeee!


	4. First day of failure

_Well here is another chapter, I am sorry for the long wait. Life kinda sucks sometimes and it was hard to find inspiration. It hit me in the face last weekend though and this is what I came up with. I hope you enjoy!_

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Alfred couldn't stop staring. Yes, he knew that it was rude. Yes, he knew he should have stopped. Yes, he knew that ….that it was some third thing but he could not think straight at the moment. He did not remember the other nation's boobs being this big! It was like they grew over night after they went home from the bar. For god's sake how could he not stare?!

"U-Um, Mr. America?" the woman in front of him squeaked.

"Yeah?" he barely managed to pull his eyes away from her…. 'Large tracks of land'.

"Matthew said you need a ride to my b-brothers home, is that still right?" Ukraine blushed a little and tugged at the hem of her coat. "I-If it is not then I am sorry! I did not mean to interrupt your trip!"

Alfred stared at her slightly while she spoke; she seemed kind, which was almost shocking if you consider her siblings. "I need a ride if you aren't busy," his routine smile crossed his lips. "How do you know Matty again?" The American began to walk through the snow once again. He had not even made it into the safe warm building; the other nation had hurried out to meet him. It wasn't like he was complaining or anything but a few minutes of warmth would have been nice in this weather. He had no idea how he would survive a month here, and it would suck since Christmas would be a few days after he was able to leave! How was he supposed to get ready in only two days? There would be so much to do when he got home, and he doubted that Tony would help him. The damn lazy alien…

"Oh! We have been friends for a long time," the woman said while she followed him. A soft smile crossed her lips; Canada was actually the first one to recognize her as her own nation after the fall of the Soviet Union. They had been close friends since then; it always broke her heart when others did not see the poor blond. However, his ability to pass as his brother had helped them out for this little mission. It should be easy after they get the two together in the same house, after that it would only be a matter of time before…

"Well, I'm glad my bro has a friend!" Alfred laughed, snapping Yeka out of her thoughts.

She smiled a little bit it was so sweet to see that Alfred cared so much about his brother. It was clear in his tone and the slight hop in his step that suddenly appeared. Pausing for a moment, Ukraine peeked around to the snow mobile she had borrowed from her brother's home. It was much easier then trying to drive a car in this weather. "Over here hero boy!" she called, pointing at the machine.

Alfred looked over to what she was pointing at, why was there only one...? Crap! He would have to sit behind her? A blush colored his cold cheeks as his ego withered a little and died. "Cool." He muttered.

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"Brother, where have you gone?" A woman's voice rang out through the otherwise silent house. The sound of her boots tapping against the wooden hallway echoed hauntingly through the house. "I know you are here somewhere, come out and marry me!" she ordered. Belarus paused by the door of a closet that she had already passed a number of times on her hunt for the Russian. Her slim hand rested on the door while she waited for any sound that would lead her in the right direction.

Ivan was sitting on the floor of the closet his hands were covering his mouth and nose to muffle any sounds of his breathing. His whole body tensed when the footsteps paused at his door. The nations watched a shadow block the light from the crack at the bottom of the doorway. It was growing harder and harder to stay quiet with his sister right outside the door. Why would she not just go away? There was a slightly creek and his eyes shot up to the door handle. His breath caught in his throat when it slowly twisted. The door slowly began to open when the doorbell rang out through the house.

Belarus paused when a loud chiming noise erupted from the front hall. Was her brother expecting guests? With a slight growl, she pushed the closet door closed and hurried to the front door. She would get rid of whoever the person was. Then she can be alone with her brother once again.

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Alfred could almost kiss the ground; he was already sprawled out on the snow as it were. The woman was a crazy driver! He thought he was gonna die for god's sake! "Never…again," he muttered to the snow.

Ukraine was leaning over him, a small smile gracing her lips. "Come on Mr. America, unless you want to get frostbite of course," she chuckled. The American mumbled into the snow but she did not catch what he said. Shrugging slightly she grabbed two of his bags and wandered towards the door. She hoped her brother had forgotten about that bill he had brought up. Resting one of the bags on the ground, she lifted her hand and knocked on the intimidating door for the second time that day.

Alfred slowly sat up, snow fell from his hair and jacket. His body trembled from the cold, "Damn, I really don't wanna be here," he huffed. After struggling to his feet, he grabbed his remaining bag and trudged to the porch to stand next to Yeketarina.

The door swung open only moments later to reveal another girl. Alfred's eyebrow raised slightly at the woman. He was unsure of whom she was but she definitely felt like another nation. How many sisters did Ivan have?

"Belarus! Oh, I thought I had lost you, please do not leave me alone again!" Ukraine cried before reaching out to the woman. "It is almost time for us to go home," she smiled, her hand making contact with the other woman's shoulder.

Alfred blinked when Belarus shot him a dark glare she scared him a little. For some reason the movie Hocus Pocus popped into his head. Hey, if you used your imagination she could seem like a witch! The American barely held back his urge to ask if she has taken any children into a land of enchantment recently.

"Why is he here?" Belarus hissed, leaning closer to her sister.

"He is going to be visiting for some time sister, it is due to business," she lied quickly.

Alfred peeked at Ukraine, why would she lie to her sister about this?

"It better just be business," the long-haired nation growled, shooting Alfred a dark look.

The American took a step back, almost tripping over the bag that Ukraine had rested on the ground. Damn she looked scary, this was ridicules all of this trouble for a mere bet? Maybe he should just go home and play some video games!

"It is just business," Ukraine reassured the other woman. "Now go wait by the snow mobile, I am leaving Alfred in the front hall and then we are going."

Belarus stared at her sister for a moment before huffing and storming off through the snow towards their ride. Alfred relaxed slightly glad that her cold eyes were off of him. "You're really gonna just dump me here and run?" he whispered to the busty woman.

Ukraine nodded and grabbed the bag that she had set down, "Yes, I am abandoning you here America, I wish you the best of luck." She put the bag down in the front hall and hurried out of the door.

Alfred stood there, looking around when the door slammed shut behind him. A slight shudder ran through his body. What has he gotten himself into?

"Day one in hell," he whispered to himself. Abandoning his bags on the floor, he began to roam around the seemingly empty house, looking for the Russian.

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Ivan had slipped out of the closet when he heard the front door shut; he bet Ukraine was the one at the door. She usually appeared and saved him before Belarus could really hurt him. He was unsure of why those two were there though. And when would the American arrive?

His violet eyes slipped shut and he allowed his feet to lead him towards his living room. He was not aware of the footsteps that were approaching him. The nation turned a corner and bumped into something hard and very warm. His eyes snapped open as he stumbled back. He found himself gazing into deep blue eyes, "Oh, America, I had not realized that you were here," his regular smile crossed his lips.

"Yeah, I'm here Commie," the American muttered.

His smile slipped a little at his insult, "Since you are here, I will show you to your room." The Russian turned away from him a dark frown replacing his smile when the American could not see him anymore. "Day one," he whispered to himself.

* * *

Everyone has their own opinions about Alfred F. Jones. Most nations found him to be a loud and somewhat obnoxious person. Some thought he was a great person and would strive to agree with him and be his friend. Then there were those who loathed the sunny blond and did not care whether he lived or died. Many of these opinions varied on how the American acted at one time. He was usually loud and annoying which led to the many negative opinions and even fights. However, there were times when America was very quiet. If one looked close enough when he was quiet, they could almost see the wheels in his head turning. A quiet America was a very bad thing it meant that a plot was a foot and everyone should beware.

Alfred's plans were very difficult to follow at times and sometimes they were very straightforward in their evilness. It all depended on how creative Alfred was feeling, or how much caffeine he had consumed. Tony was usually in on his plots but the alien had ducked out for these reckless ideas. Apparently, the alien wanted nothing to do with the Russian or Alfred's troubles. It seemed like a better idea to just kick back alone in the house, play video games, and eat whatever he wanted. The traitor…

It did not matter though! Alfred did need him for his plan to get out of here. He could do it all on his own without any help from anyone else. He even made back up plans in case his first one did not work. He thought himself a genius in this moment of brilliance.

"Okay!" Alfred said to himself. He was sitting on the comfortable bed that Ivan said was his for the next month. The room the bed was in as a mossy green color, he found it a very odd color for a room, but it was kind of nice and relaxing. There was one window in the room that was covered with thick blinds that would block out all light. The bed had a large black metal frame and was covered with a comforter that had a black and white pattern. There was a dresser against the wall furthest from the bed, when Alfred had checked it the thing had been empty. The American had thought about unpacking his things but he did not think he would be here long enough for it to matter. There was a dark wood nightstand beside the bed, a lamp rested on its polished surface. The rest of the room was bare.

Alfred had tossed his suitcase onto the bed and left it there as he tried to figure out the fine points of his evil plots. He was ready not to put it all into action. "Right! Time to put my 'Annoy the Commie until he makes you leave plan' into action!" He announced to…no body. Alfred chuckled evilly when he unzipped his case and began to dig through his things. He tossed clothing and other random things all over the room before he found what he was looking for.

He slowly pulled out a few walkie-talkies that he had so smartly packed. He smirked and held them up towards the heavens as though they were holy objects. "Excellent!" he laughed heartily.

It took him about a half an hour and a lot of sneaking around until his plan was set up. The American sat in his room surrounded by five different walkie-talkies. All of their mates were carefully set up around the house, he had snuck one into the Commie's room, one in a room full of books, who knew the Russian had a library? One hidden in the living room, one in the bathroom cabinet, and the last one was on top of the fridge hidden behind a bunch of bottles of vodka.

It all seemed perfect so far! Alfred pulled his phone out of his pocket and searched through the music on it, once he found the perfect song he was quiet and waited to hear the Russian wandering around the large empty home.

* * *

Ivan was feeling annoyed already, he had listened quietly in a small room while America wandered around his home. The room was a sky blue, there were a bunch of bright yellow sunflowers painted on the walls so the room looked like a field of the Russian's favorite flower.

The Russian did not move from his spot he was feeling too warm to be bothered by the trouble making American. Ivan's head tilted slightly when the wandering stopped he strained his hearing to try to locate where the American was. The utter silence was a little unnerving to him, which was odd because he usually liked the quiet. This could not be a good thing. What was the blond up to? The thoughts were slowly driving him mad and he soon stood. His feet led him out of the room he looked up and down the hallway, his violet eyes scanning for anything that was out of place. He was surprised when everything was still clean despite the American roaming around. Apparently, Alfred had not caused any trouble yet.

After a few more moments, Ivan turned down the hall, his boots beat loudly against the wooden floor marking where he was in his home. A drink sounded really nice right now to calm his mind. The distinct sound of his boots changed when they reached the tile floor. He was in the kitchen no more then ten seconds before he had a fresh bottle of vodka in his hands. The Russian was about to exit the room when a loud sound suddenly filled the room.

"Two single hearts on fire currently on the wire! As inhibitions fade a focused moment made!" a voice suddenly sang out.

The sudden music and voice had startled Ivan the vodka bottle slipped from his fingers, crashing loudly against the floor. He looked down at the shattered glass the fact that his vodka had been ruined really ticked him off. The music suddenly cut off, he looked around slowly trying to figure out where the damned noise had come from.

When everything was silent for a few moments Ivan went to a drawer and pulled out a towel. He began to clean up the mess when the music suddenly came back.

"Bruises and bite marks say takes one to bring the pain! Passion lies in screams of ecstatic dreams. You're in a place for fear lips are for biting here!" the voice cried out.

Once again, Ivan was startled, not so much by the noise but what the voice was saying. Where the hell was this music coming from!? It soon stopped once again though leaving him looking around the room in confusion. This had the American written all over it but how was he doing it? Ivan continued to clean in silence. No more music played for the rest of the time he was in the kitchen.

After the glass and liquid was cleaned up, Ivan quickly escaped the room, hustling towards his library. Maybe he could find a book that would calm him rather then risking another bottle. Some peace and quiet was all that Ivan would need. Once again, his boots stomped against the wooden floor, marking where he was in the house while he walked. The Russian was suspicious when he reached the heavy oak doors of his library. Had he left one of them open the last time he was in there? Probably, he doubted Alfred was stupid enough to wander around these rooms without Ivan with him.

Ivan should have known by then that he could never underestimate the stupidity of the American.

The unsuspecting man rifled through a few of his books when music filled this room as well. "Let's make this moment worth a while! Let's kill the night and go down in style!" the voice echoed around the room before stopping again. Ivan's eye twitched slightly when he heard laughter from above him. What had that damned American done to his rooms?

* * *

Alfred couldn't help his laughter, it was just too damn funny to imagine the expression that the Commie must have had on his face! The blond rolled back and forth on his bed his tan hands clutched his stomach as tears streaked down his cheeks. "O-Oh! This is just too good!" he laughed more. He had heard the bottle break earlier during his first attack. He had been concerned for a moment before he realized where he was and who exactly broke the bottle. It became funny after that point. It would only be a matter of time before Ivan had enough and kicked him out! His plan was definitely going to work the first time through!

His happiness was killed when he realized that the sound of boots pounding against wood was heading right for his door. "Oh crap!" he cried. Hopping off the bed quickly he attempted to shove himself under the bed. His torso managed to be easily hidden but something was keeping the rest of him out in the open. "Come on heroic butt get under here!" he ordered, struggling and wiggling to try to get his ass under the bed.

The bed however, had other plans for the poor hero. It had clearly been paid to reject such an awesome heroic butt. There was no other explanation in Alfred's mind of why it could not fit! The blonds body froze when the door swung open. He shuddered when the wood bounced roughly against the wall there was no doubt in his mind that it left a dent. Alfred closed his eyes tightly, praying that the other would over look his butt and legs that were in plain view.

The hero held his breath as the footsteps slowly neared him. They stopped right next to where his exposed body was. Taking a chance, he cracked an eye open and looked towards where they stopped. All that he saw was a scuffed pair of brown boots that were obviously made to handle snow. The fact that Ivan was taking so long to do something in retaliation to his prank was making Alfred very nervous. What the heck was he planning?

Wait! Was he just standing there watching his butt? The pervert! Though Alfred couldn't blame him if he was….he was sure that he had a nice booty. However, since when did Russia act like Franc…? His thought was cut off when the boots moved. There was only a moments warning before Ivan stepped down on Alfred's butt and lower back.

"GAH!" Alfred cried. His body wiggled while his arms and legs flailed wildly. "DUDE GET THE HECK OFF OF ME! YOU'RE TOO HEAVY TO STAND ON SOMEONE!" he shouted. No matter how much he wiggled though Ivan managed to keep his feet firmly planted on Alfred's gluteus maximus.

"DUDE THIS REALLY HURTS! STOP ALREADY!" the blond whined loudly.

"Not until you apologize," came a muffled reply.

"FOR WHAT? I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING MAN!" the American growled, shaking his hips to try to tip him off.

"Da, you did and you know exactly what you did. So apologize before I hit you with pipe."

This was an interesting threat, being stood on was a lot better then being hit with a rusty old water pipe. Maybe it was for the best if he apologized, not that the hero regretted doing any of this, but he didn't wanna bleed everywhere! "Alright dude! I'm….I'm sorry! Now get off of me before you crush me!"

There was a paused before the weight was removed from Alfred's lower body. He stayed partway under the bed and watched the boots leave his room the door slowly closing behind them.

"Next time I should lock the door first," Alfred mused aloud before sneezing at the dust bunnies that had hopped over to say hello.

* * *

_Well there ya go, I will see you next chapter!_


End file.
